Sunday, December 26, 2010

Zestz for Laughs - An Election Campaign

While walking down the main street in a highland resort one day a particularly obnoxious Member of Parliament is tragically hit by a double-decker tour bus and dies.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I have made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the Right Honourable*.

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules," says St. Peter.

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and dressed in the finest batik there is. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then indulge themselves on lobsters, caviar and the most expensive food there is.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises.

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St.Peter is waiting for him.

"Now it' s time to visit heaven."

So, 24 hours pass with The Right Honorable joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The Right Honourable reflects for a minute, then he answers:

"Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I am better off in hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.

"I don't understand," stammers The Right Honorable. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golfcourse and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank honey, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable.

What happened?"

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning just like you during an election......

Today you voted."

Submitted by John. Author unknown

  • DISCLAIMER: Right Honourable, abbreviated as The Rt Hon., is an honourific prefix that is traditionally applied to certain people in the Anglo-Celt world, usually to members of parliament. Malaysian MPs are Yang Berhormat(s), so it should be crystal clear to everyone that NOBODY here is trying to cast any aspersions on the integrity of our YBs.

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