Sunday, December 12, 2010

Zestz for LAUGHS

A friend sent us these, author(s) unknown:

In the middle of a gynaecologists conference, an English and a French gynaecologist are discussing various interesting cases they have recently treated....

French gynaecologist: “Only last week, zer was zis woman ooh came to see me, and ‘er cleetoris.......eet was like a melon.”

English gynaecologist: “Don’t be absurd my good man, it could not possibly have been that big, the poor woman wouldn’t have been able to walk if it was.”

French gynaecologist: “O la la, you eengleesh, zer you go again, always talkeeng about ze size... I was talkeeng about ze taste.”

Morris complained to his friend Irving, that love making with his wife was becoming routine and boring.

“Get creative Morris. Break up the monotony. Why don’t you try ‘playing doctor’ for an hour?

“That’s what I do,” said Irving.

“Sounds great,” Morris replied, “but how do you make it last for an hour?”

“Just keep her in the waiting room for 55 minutes!”

A famous heart specialist doctor died and everyone was gathered at his funeral. A regular coffin was displayed in front of a huge heart. When the minister finished with the sermon and after everyone said their good-byes, the heart was opened, the coffin rolled inside, and the heart closed.

Just at that moment one of the mourners started laughing. The guy next to him asked: "Why are you laughing?"

"I was thinking about my own funeral" the man replied.

"What's so funny about that?"

"I'm a gynecologist."

One woman says to another, "I can't understand why you haven't gone to see that new gynecologist yet! I mean he's so young and handsome! And your gynecologist is so old!"

The other woman replies with a smile, "Yeah, I know. His hands shake all the time!"

This guy wakes up out of a deep sleep and, feeling real horny, nudges his wife awake and asks, “Why don’t we get it on, eh?” She replies, “I have an appointment at the gynecologist tomorrow and you know I don’t like to make love the night before.” So the husband agrees, rolls back over and starts to go back to sleep.

A few minutes later, he nudges his wife again and asks, “You don’t by any chance have a dentist’s appointment tomorrow, do you?”

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